torn apart

eyes that shed tears...
heart that breaks...
soul that tear apart...
dreams that disappear...
life that has turned up side down...
yet to say thank you seems so easy for a child to say...
to forgive is so easy for them to offer...
to embrace those people who hurt them...
to smile back to those who give nothing but grin...
i wonder how i can be like a child
when my heart is full of sorrow and pain
when my soul cries out for questions why
when my senses disagree to stay alive
when i know nothing anymore but bitterness i have inside
and my eyes starts to shed tears....
and my heart starts to break apart as with my soul...
and i continue to wonder how...
how i can stay up right...
how can i stay standing firm and fight...
yet inside..i really don't know the reason why...
why i have to stand firm...
and what reason i have to fight...
its just too heavy to carry on my shoulder...
i am in search of happiness...for quite a while
and i always end up crying and wondering why...